When I was a college professor I used to tell my students that “there are no stupid questions”, but that was 25 years ago, back when entry into the computer room was closely guarded. Back then, Geekdom had “barriers to entry“, and only those people who had studied for years could gain entry into the multi-million dollar mainframe and become a “Data Processing” professional.

Today, you don’t need no stinkin High School diploma to elevate yourself to the title of “IT professional”, and the dolts among us need to be constantly reminded that 30 years ago they would be selling shoes at K-Mart:
http://www.dba-oracle.com/t_narcissistic_personality_disorders.htm
We have seen many types of DBAs Database Administrators whose characteristic potential determines who they are. Those technocrats are perfect fabulous, and wise. They protect a company from ruining.
Anyway, there are many “common sense” parallels to people with personality disorders, and I’m dealing with a computer professional who has a a textbook case of narcissistic personality disorder (NPD). Other terms I hear used to describe NPD victims include “prick”, “assh*le”, and “twit”, but I’ve learned that there is a lot that a savvy computer guy can do to get along with the computer narcissist, and get them to cooperate.
Because I work exclusively with computer professionals, I’m exposed to all sorts of personality disorders, a regular DSM-V of weird behavior, but narcissism is right up there at the top of the heap.
Disclaimer: This article is only intended as a light-hearted look at the DBA profession, and it is based solely on my unscientific observations of DBA personality types. It is my hope that you will see yourself in some of these DBA personality types and that these descriptions will remind you of a fellow DBA.

Also see my fun Computer Motivational Posters and other humor articles.
Some Oracle concepts are best expressed in a visual manner.
Oracle RMAN:
DAY 1
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Analysis of Performance Issues
Using Automated Memory Management (AMM) with RAC
Disk Monitoring and Tuning for RAC and ASM
Monitoring RAC Cluster Interconnect Performance
Undesirable Global Cache Statistics
Monitoring CURRENT Blocks
Additional Wait Events of Concern
Global Cache Service Times
GCS Monitoring
Use of the “CACHE_TRANSFER” Views
Monitoring the GES Processes
Monitoring the Global Directory
Monitoring and Tuning RAC using OEM
Configuring the Oracle Intelligent Agent With RAC
Step-By-Step Setup of the Intelligent Agents on UNIX
Monitoring RAC Using OEM
RAC Tuning Guidelines
Growth of Powerful Processors
Why Parallel Processing?
Opportunities for Parallelism
Scalability
Parallel Databases
Types of Parallelism
High Performance Computing Cluster
Oracle RAC – High Performance and Highly Available Database
DAY 2
Internals of Real Application Clusters Tuning
Overview of Cache Fusion
Evolution of Cache Fusion
Nature of Cache Fusion
Benefits of Cache Fusion
Concurrency and Consistency
Cache Coherency
Global Cache Service
SGA Components and Locking
SGA – System Global Area
Program Global Area (PGA)
Buffer Cache Management
What is a Dirty Block?
Multi – Version Consistency Model
This is an intensive 3-day hands-on Oracle Real Application Clusters (RAC) tuning course.
Unlike other Oracle RAC tuning classes, this course is taught by a practicing RAC expert with years of experience in tuning mission-critical RAC databases.
The course focuses on RAC disk I/O tuning, SGA tuning and tuning the cache fusion cluster interconnect. The course will also include specialized Oracle RAC tuning script for monitoring all of the critical RAC performance areas.
This hands-on Oracle RAC training is special because this course is taught by a veteran Oracle Certified DBA with years of full-time experience.
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RAC Lock tuning Components
Global Cache Service
Global Enqueque Service
Row-Level Locks
Global Resource Directory
RAC Processes
Resource Coordination
Synchronization
GCS Resource Modes and Roles
Concept of Past Image
Lock Modes
Block Access Modes and Buffer States
Cache Fusion Scenarios
Block transfers using Cache Fusion – Examples
Block Access, Grants, and Interrupts
Cache Fusion and Recovery tuning
Recovery Features
Recovery Methodology and Steps
Recovery Process – Re-mastering
DAY 3
RAC Performance Monitoring and Tuning
Analysis of Performance Issues
Monitoring RAC Cluster Interconnect Performance
Use of the cache_transfer Views
Monitoring the GES Processes
Monitoring and Tuning using OEM
Configuring the Oracle Intelligent Agent with RAC
Step-by-Step Setup of the Intelligent Agents on UNIX
Monitoring RAC using OEM
RAC Parallel Execution
Overview
Types of Parallelism
Parallelism in Oracle Relational Database
Parallel Execution Mechanism
Granules for Parallelism
Parallel Execution Servers
Degree of Parallelism – DOP
Parallel Query: SELECT
Parallel DML – Update, Merge, Delete
Parallel DML – Insert…Select
Parallel DDL Statements
Rules for Paralleling “Create Table as Select” (CTAS)
SQL*LOADER – Parallel Load
Other Parallel Operations
Initialization Parameters at a Glance
Monitoring and Diagnosing the Parallel Execution
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This is a BC Oracle training course (c) 2007-2009
The Gung-Ho DBA is generally characterized by a “can-do” attitude. They are always bright and outgoing, and they always seem to be in a hurry. They tend to be impatient (especially with stupid developer questions), and they never “suffer fools gladly.”
http://www.dba-oracle.com/articles.htm#humor1
http://www.rampant-books.com/menu_oracle.htm
http://www.dba-oracle.com/training.htm
http://www.dba-oracle.com/t_visual_guide_oracle_concepts.htm
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FAWN: Fast Array of Wimpy Nodes for Sun Oracle, Google, and Facebook
FAWN: Fast Array of Wimpy Nodes for Sun Oracle, Google, and Facebook:
by mbenedict October 16, 2009 7:12 PM PDT
It’s not just about the raw cost. There’s a finite amount of electricity you can bring to a data center, so at some point the number of queries you can do per kWh becomes very important. The article mentions heat as waste but like electricity, heat itself also becomes a limiting factor in a large data center. There’s only so much cooling capacity available beyond which you get severe diminishing returns.
So a system which promises to be more energy efficient and runs cooler at the same time… that could be a big win.
by symbolset October 17, 2009 8:19 PM PDT
I’ve been a proponent of FAWN for a long time. For ten years the software has provided the redundancy and the scale. FAWN is not the right answer for every problem, but no tool is.
Configuring the right solution for massively parallel problems is a fairly complex geometry. If you approach a large-grain problem from a cents-per-compute-per-second perspective then FAWN is a slam dunk. For fine-grain problems you want to use GPGPU instead. When the problem becomes large enough, custom system boards and esoteric processors enter the solution set.
It’s really only when you don’t know the granularity of the problem, or you need a general solution that solves both ends of the granularity scale and the middle too that Industry Standard architectures are ideal. In these cases a mixed cluster of wimpy nodes combined with GPGPU nodes may be more cost effective.
Oh, and about cooling: The answer to many problems that start “How do you…” is… don’t. As many have shown the correct answer to the cooling problem is not refrigeration, it’s location, location, location. Your servers are rated to 35C (95F) at least, and if the ambient temperature where they are rises above that, you located your servers in the wrong geographic area, which is a different problem. There are lots of places you could put your servers that won’t get that hot in the next decade. Put your servers some place where the ambient temperature never goes out of range, preferably where they have cheap power (I hear Canada is nice). To find the ideal operation for the fans of your datacenter, heat the inlet temperature to 35C. Fire up the equipment and stress test it at maximum capacity. Measure the outlet temperature. Now you have the ideal outlet temperature. Regulate the fan on the exhaust such that the exhaust is consistently that temperature, less a few degrees for safety, and your server components will remain at a consistent temperature (thus preventing swings in temperature which can cause problems). This is not as complicated as you might think. As an added benefit during a “heat wave” stationary inversion the thermodynamics of a hot exhaust plume exiting high above the building plus the related ground-level cool air inlets creates a cooling breeze which diminishes the air conditioning required to cool the humans in the related office spaces when they’re not in the datacenter. Don’t insulate the datacenter part either – that’s swimming upstream. Maintaining a snow load on the roof should not be a design goal. Also, in really intemperate climes filter the exhaust and pass it through the human workspaces (or if you’re really fussy, use a heat exchanger) – the servers are heating air, there’s no sense burning extra energy to heat separate air to keep the humans comfy.
by ckurowic October 18, 2009 11:01 AM PDT
I disagree with your point of recirculating the hot air from the servers to people’s work areas. Some are VERY sensitive to the outgassing that occurs when equipment is new (and even for many months afterward). You have interesting concepts, but I’m afraid you don’t have the engineering background to support it.
by Christopher_Mims October 20, 2009 11:47 AM PDT
Great article – provides a lot of detail that didn’t make it into my own write-up of FAWN for Technology Review. If you’re interested in a slightly different take, though:
http://www.technologyreview.com/computing/22504/?a=f
“We were looking at efficiency at sub-maximum load. We realized the same techniques could serve high loads more efficiently as well,” said David Andersen, the Carnegie Mellon assistant professor of computer science who helped lead the project.
It’s not just academic work. Google, Intel, and NetApp are helping to fund the project, and the researchers are talking to Facebook, too. “We want to understand their challenges,” Andersen said.
Cut the power
These large-scale systems don’t come cheap. Besides the hardware, software, and maintenance costs, there’s power, too–and companies often must pay for energy twice, in effect, because servers’ waste heat means data centers must be cooled down.
by catbutt5 October 16, 2009 11:51 AM PDT
Oh, I needed a good laugh…
“And addressing the brains… Anil Rao is one inventor on a … patent applied for a computer system with numerous independent processor modules that share access to shared resources including storage, networking, and boot-up technology called the BIOS.”
Trying to patent something that’s existed for more than 20 years are you? Good luck with that.
Anil, ever heard of Sun or IBM or companies that sell refrigerator sized (small and large) computers full of little card slots containing memory and processors (even at different frequencies) that share storage, networking and yes, even the BIOS? It’s the same concept.
What’s your act 2? Gonna try to patent the automobile?
by kirkktx October 16, 2009 12:54 PM PDT
“52 queries per joule of energy compared to 346 for a FAWN cluster”
Somewhere I saw that electricity costs exceed hardware costs amortized over the life of the computer. These numbers should certainly attract investors.
http://news.cnet.com/8301-30685_3-10376537-264.html?tag=mncol
